Tried posting in r/sex but let [M26]y regrets lie here. Learned to avoid using Hot Tub jets tonight. | 2016

Hi there! I'm a male who really likes anal. I love giving it, and I enjoy giving it to myself (have yet to really explore it with a partner).

I first discovered my ass hole feeling fantastic when I was like 14. I was in a pool with a friend of mine and I noticed the jets were quite strong. Between porn and fascination over sharing a pleasure center with women I decided to maneuver my asshole over one of the water jets and it was pretty unique of a feeling. I pressed up against and I guess the warm water and my comfort hit a peak cause my teenage butt just opened right up and let in a flood. I freaked, clenched, hustled over to the only bathroom which my friend was occupying.

I thought I had been sly about the whole ordeal but when I gave him shit for taking too damn long he said something along the lines of, maybe you shouldn't have been pushing water in your ass.

Been a pretty private but humorous memory for me and didn't do much with it until an hour ago.

Today has been a day of indulgences, accidentally, so as I sat at my computer and started watching porn I figured I could hit myself with my dirtiest and oddest of indulgences, butt masturbating. I don't have an enema kit or toys or anything, so I've put together strategies to clean myself out and play with myself which I think, ultimately, make it less enjoyable then it actually could be... but hey, they work, and I don't have any shit in my room I would need to explain to my mother.

After a subpar session I figured... fuck it... why indulge half way? So I slammed a few shots, took an ibuprofen and went to a hot tub, you know: relax, kill pain, get things flowing. Got some porn going on my phone, sat, chilled, looked at the stars... and then the rum hit hard and I thought back to invasive jets.

So why not fucking indulge right? Turned all the jets on, and felt around for which ones had some real penetration. I didn't want to get my hands wet so I could keep choosing videos, but low and behold the tsunami strength jet was at the lowest possible part of the tub. But "Fuck It". Put my knees down and wiggled my (questionably) straight mostly virgin ass hole over to catch its force.

Considering I'd just been pushing a pretty thick bottle into it, it wasn't opening but the rough massage felt pretty good; not what I wanted. So in goes one finger and I can tell my butt isn't letting up. So in goes two fingers (backed away from the jet for good positioning) and with that I can spread my self enough to let in the flow. Oh boy did it flow. My ass was a gape and with my fingers I could feel the cavern I had just created.

How fucking amused and turned on was I. It felt hella good. So good, I let it go for a while, shifted to stop it, and went back for seconds. Now I'm rethinking my whole, "no toys and no enemas" deal cause "not my fingers" or "what ever is phallic" around me is pleasurable... And that's when my stomach got all warm.

I felt totally fine. I figured I would have to expel some liquid. I was getting drunk. So as I pressured a finger onto my male G lump finally I thought, "There is no way that this isn't hitting me deeper than I feel it." I ain't dumb, I know nerves end pretty much after the suppository ring.

So I hopped out, squated over the grass, and pushed. Sure enough I got a wave of slightly acidic butt liquid. WHOO! Got it over with. Let turn this shit off and get to a bathroom where I can diddle my fiddle to symphony.

I won't waste more time... I got to the bathroom. I started the orchestra.. and then another wave of butt chlorine water came that my fingers avoided. Back too it. Shit that video was hot, thank you Germany. Then another wave. Then another. My asshole was Khaled. Another one. Another one. Another one and another one.

My asshole took in FUCKING GALLONS of the god damn hot tub. In the moment this ended any possibility of orgasm. I was freaking out as gurgles and waves could be felt in the deepest reaches of my miles of intestine. Everytime I thought I felt something, there is was a few minutes later. I merely was a transportation vessel from the tub to the toilet.

I'm salty about it. Which would be funny if it were a salt water tub but it's all chemical and Ph'd to just kill what ever is inside. So yeah, a wee bit worried... but it is an indulgence day. So I got some spanking levels of lesbian porn going getting my body ready to recover, ready to erupt in ecstasy. I blame the rum.

Tl:dr Jacuzzi jets will help you cleanse the deepest depths of your innards.