"Set Up" leads to laughter and pash-rash aplenty [M/F] | 2016

Internet Relay Chat (IRC) used to be a thing - probably still is a thing - but it used to be THE thing to facilitate chat online before Facebook, before MySpace before the turn of the millennium.

I used to chat on IRC quite a bit and became quite an active member of some IRC communities which led to some interesting parties where I met interesting people with whom I continued to chat and do interesting things both online and in the flesh.

One such interesting person was a woman, Donna, who was older than I was, she was in her mid thirties and I was in my early to mid twenties. We'd chat online and catch up for coffee in the flesh (IRL) and generally shoot the breeze. We never had any chemistry sexually but she was nice and funny and found me the same and told me so - we were to each other a nice time. So we'd met a few times IRL and Donna says to me "I'd like to set you up with a friend of mine, Jenny. I think you'd like her." - her words "set you up" not mine. Now I'd mentioned to Donna that I was doing the FWB thing with a couple of girls from time to time and didn't have a girlfriend but Donna seemed unphased on Jenny's behalf so on that understanding I agreed to be "set up" as my friend had put it.

Now I am unsure as to whether Jenny had the introduction described to her in the same terms as "set up" but we agreed that Jenny and I and Donna and her sometime boyfriend Phil would meet for coffee at a local stand up club and see where things went.

So the appointed night came and I turned up at the comedy stand up club to meet with Donna + 2. We met early, 7.00 for a 9.30 show I guess so that we could suss the situation out and decide whether we all wanted to proceed. Jenny and Phil and Donna arrived about 5 minutes after I did and we all ordered coffee and sat down to get through the Sound of Music part of the evening.

As we all appeared to be getting more comfortable with the situation I let slip that this was one of the less painful Sound of Music coffees I'd had in recent times and was met with questioning looks all round. "Sound of Music?"

"Yeah, Sound of Music. You know the 'getting to know you getting to know all about you.' part of the night"

With that Donna almost choked on her cappuccino and Jenny and Phil burst into laughter.

From there it was safeties off and fire at will with the Monty Python references, double entendres, innuendos, Blackadder, Billy Connolly and Young Ones references.

9.30 came and went and Donna and Phil made their excuses to leave. I suspect they never intended to stay for the show just to make sure Jenny was OK with the situation or perhaps to make sure I was OK with the situation - either way we were OK and they decided they weren't required any longer.

At the time Jenny would have been in her late twenties, a little on the chubby side, 5'10" long curly blonde mane of hair, curves aplenty and sported HUGE and I mean massive boobs. She later told me they were an H cup.

In pretty short order we decided we were far more entertaining, to each other at least, than any stand up open mike gig could possibly be and could have coffee or wine or anything else at Jenny's place.

So we each drive to Jenny's townhouse and get stuck into some red wine and the conversation then turns - not completely form comedy but temporarily to classic movies it turns out we both love. We discuss the relative artistic and pop culture merits of Casablanca and several Hitchcock movies which led inevitably to 80s pop and back again to the Young Ones and Blackadder, Monty Python and Billy Connolly and Not the Nine O'Clock News segue there provided by Pamela Stephenson.

Amid the laughter there was a rising and delicious sexual tension and as the tension rose so the references became more risqué and finally Jenny referenced a Not the Nine O'Clock News sketch where Pamela Stephenson is working as a rental car receptionist and when offered an American Express Card says "That'll do nicely, thank you. And would you like to feel my tits" and just as Pam did in the NTNON sketch Jenny rips open the front of her shirt exposing these huge mounds of pale flesh supported by some fairly impressively engineered scaffolding.

I take the hint. Duh! and move in grabbing Jenny by the waist and kissing her hard on the mouth. Her lips part and she kisses me back equally hard as our tongues battle for supremacy. The tongue battle resolves in a detente and we move blindly to the couch to continue our making out as our respective tongues thrash out the terms of the armistice.

We explore each other with our hands in a frenzied pulling at each other’s clothes until Jenny is lying on the couch in nothing but her red high heels and I am burying my face in her huge bosom. They were soft and warm and wonderfully fleshy and reactive to my licking and biting. A man could lose himself in a chest like that. As I extracted my face from her cleavage Jenny and I moved/fell to the floor in front of her couch and as I started licking at her swollen clit she started blowing me. She had a blonde tuft of hair on her mound just a little more than a landing strip and she was clean shaven on her lips and she was delicious. As I licked around her flaps and teased her opening with my tongue she deep throated my cock occasionally loudly popping me out of her mouth to come up for air and utter moans and comments of encouragement or gratitude.

I love going down on a woman and certainly Jenny seemed to love me going down on her as I complemented the attention of my tongue teeth and lips by inserting first one then another and then a third finger into her hot, wet wanton cunt. She started grazing my shaft with her teeth and every now and again she'd catch her teeth on the underside of the head of my cock which made me twitch and then swirl her tongue around the head as if in an effort to make it better.

This formed the basis of a little game we started playing edging each other by bringing each other to the brink and then, in Jenny's case using her teeth too back me off from the edge of cumming or in my case going just a little harder on her clit to dampen the sensation. Edging can only last so long though before someone loses an eye and eventually as I felt my load about to burst I went harder and faster with my fingers inside her pussy and swirling rapidly around her clit with my tongue as she shuddered and slammed my cock all the way to the back of her throat as she clamped her thighs around my head. That was it for me and I shot my load deep into her throat. She didn't flinch and just kept her throat open and her teeth pressed although not biting against the base of my shaft.

Finally she released my head from her thigh crush and licked and sucked her way up my softening shaft until it escaped her lips with a loud popping sound. She lay on me with her face nestled in my pubes for a few minutes as her juices which were already coating my face and hands dripped onto my chin. It was messy and looked untidy but it felt magnificent.

As Jenny began to move to get up off me after we regained something approaching our composure I gave a quick lick from her clit to her taint lingering at the opening to her pussy along the way and she shuddered and her knee gave way fractionally. I did it again and she stopped and just stayed there allowing me to lick her pussy from beneath her as the next wave started to build in her. Almost immediately my cock started to harden again (you have to love the refractory period of a twenty something year old) and she grabbed it in her hand and started to pump it to full hardness in quick order.

As I got to full hardness I slapped her ass and told her to move over to the couch. She got off me and grabbed my hand and instead of heading to the couch led me to her bed.

She went over to her bedside table and pulled out a strip of condom and looking at my cock said "If you're going to pitch a tent you're going to need a tarp." as she threw them on the bed and crawled over it to me and took my cock in her mouth once again. She sucked on it for a few seconds until it returned to its rock hard state and then grabbed the strip of condoms and ripped one off handing it to me. I rolled it on and she turned around to present her beautiful ass and cunt. Grabbing one hip and aiming up using my other hand I slid my cock along her slit until it reached her clit and then back again as she moaned. I did it again. She moaned again. Again. Again she moaned. I was doing this now with predictable timing and so when I pulled back the last time I paused slightly and Jenny shifted her weight back to meet the anticipated slide but instead I upped the trajectory and buried my cock in her pussy as she pushed back. She yelped as I went in to about half way. I stopped there as she adjusted to my presence breathing heavily. I pulled back. She came with me so I pushed forward to bury more of my cock into her hot tight pussy. Once more I pulled back. Again she came with me. Again I stroked forward this time all the way into her hot tight cunt.

I grabbed her hips and ground into her. She ground back.

Her golden hair was draped over her face so I couldn't see her expression but the moans coming from her were hot as hellfire. I grabbed her hip and ran my other hand down her spine from her shoulders to her ass and grabbed her other hip and started to fuck.

We built up an accelerating tempo and before long she was clenching her pussy onto my cock as she came again and again. She pulled forward and I came out of her and she rolled over onto her back and spread her legs saying "It's too intense that way fuck me this way."

I knelt between her legs and fed my cock into her pussy once more and started to fuck her slowly leaning over to kiss her occasionally and played with her breasts as ground waves from our fucking moved trough them. "Tell me when you're close" she said as I upped the intensity.

I fucked her hard and fast and as I was on the edge I nodded and grunted to her that I was almost there and she wrapped her legs around my waist and grabbed my shoulders pulling me down into her breasts again as I came violently inside her smothered in her tits. It was heaven.

We spent the rest of the night talking and making out and laughing and fucking until we finally fell asleep. In the cold light of day the damage was assessed - 2 bottles of red, bodily fluids on the couch and the lounge room rug, six condoms used, hellish whisker burn on her lower lip and chin and two spent and very satisfied comedy lovers.

Jenny and I fucked a few more times after that and eventually drifted apart. Then one day after the advent of Facebook I got a friend request from an old friend but that's the start of a different story.

As always constructive criticism and comments are welcome