Along Came Two Birds - (M/F)F | 2016

I was still living with my two college roommates less than a mile off campus. I was most likely 21 at the time and I remember Obama hadn’t yet been elected President. 2007 would be a good guess. At the time I’d only brought one girl back to the apartment. The drive from Hoboken’s train station to the apartment was a half hour. It was a difficult process. That’s what made Samantha so refreshing.

The first time I slept with Samantha she actually drove over to my place. I had previously made out with her at a party while Desean had been avoiding us. I eventually drove her home that night. I remember trying to slide my hand into her pants and her saying, “Not tonight. It’s not a good time.”

A few days later, she called me and asked if I had any plans. I invited her over without hesitation. I hung up the phone and jogged into my room to clean up and get ready. I was excited at the prospect of actually having a woman come to me. I’d never had a girl friend. I’d barely slept with any girls up to that point and having one drive a half hour to see me was almost profound. I was ecstatic to hear that Matt & Aaron wouldn’t be around. Everything was perfect.

I didn’t know what to expect. It was like a High School Lacrosse game. I was the best Attack player & it was my job to score. Usually I did. I’d get at least a goal a game. Still, every single time I stepped onto the field I did my best not to think about it. The thoughts came anyway. I’d wonder how many goals I’d score, if any. I always waved the idea away while trying to keep my mind blank. Anything was better than jinxing myself. So there I was, dunking Scotch into my body in an effort to avoid thinking about sex.

Samantha walked into my apartment. I offered her a drink but she declined. We probably watched a DVD for less than five minutes. We began to make out as if we were merely continuing our night at the party. I did my best to slowly massage her tongue and teased her at every opportunity. I wasn’t great in bed, but kissing girls was where I excelled.

I’d had enough. I smiled as I looked into her eyes. I then picked her up as she giggled and grabbed my face. We kept making out as I carried her into my bedroom. I then laid her onto my full size bed. We kissed while we stripped each other naked. I made sure to go down on her in case the sex proved lacking. I loved looking at her body. Even though her breasts were small, I’d never seen such an amazing ass before. At the time, she had been the sexiest girl I’d ever slept with.

I walked her to her car. She parked a few blocks away due to the poor parking situation. I kissed her through the driver side window. I could tell she really liked me. She lingered for a few minutes. I was partly at fault. I liked kissing her. I always thought it was romantic to say goodbye only to pull the girl back and kiss her again. The back and forth was cheesy but cute.

I walked back inside as Matt joined me at the door. He had his headphones still on from his daily workout. I held the door open for him and we walked in together. He must have been trying to finish the song he was listening to because he simply nodded when he saw me. He took them off once we walked inside.

"Who was that girl I saw you talking with?" He asked. He had grabbed a bottle of vitamin water from the fridge.

"Oh… You saw us?" I asked, trying not to blush. I stood by my foozeball table ready to answer more questions.

"Yea dude, you were like making out with her in the middle of the street."

"Oh," I chuckled slightly while smirking. "Yea, that was Samantha. Girl from that party I went to."

"You sleep with her?" Matt asked. He was walking backwards towards the room we shared.

"Yea, grabbed one of your condoms. Hope you don’t mind."

"It’s cool."

I followed him into our room. I pulled out my laptop and showed him her Facebook profile. He seemed both impressed and disinterested. He pulled off both emotions with a simple eyebrow shrug. I guess that wasn’t enough for me.

"Well, you still feel like going out tonight?" Matt asked.

"Yea, why not? I mean, I’m definitely not going to shower."

"What?" Matt asked half laughing.

"I want to go out with this sex smell. See if it attracts anyone."

Matt was now chuckling loudly. “Jesus man.”

"Dude, just wait." I started laughing with him. "Anyway, even if it doesn’t work, I feel great. She was fucking hot. I don’t care if nothing happens tonight. I had my fair share of fun."

Matt looked up open bars in New York. We ended up deciding on going to Amsterdam Avenue which was in the Upper West Side. We weren’t regular patrons to the strip of bars located on the main street, but we felt like mixing it up. It was good to try something new. I also had no expectations, so I left everything up to Matt. I’d be blame free if we ended up coming home empty handed.

From the moment I walked into that first and only bar, I felt at home. Matt and I talked to almost every girl in the place. I kept bouncing around like a ping pong ball. Every girl was receptive. Every conversation was meaningful. It was as if I could do no wrong. I’d never experienced anything like that in my life. I was in love with the night.

Eventually the bar began to slowly empty out. Matt had apparently run into his ex-girlfriend while I had been hopping from girl to girl. He didn’t explain what had happened until the next night, but I noticed he was holding a rose while talking to two girls. I figured I might as well be a good wing man.

The girl Matt was talking to was an attractive blonde. She had a nice body and a cute face. Her friend was average looking and could have benefited from losing a few pounds. It wasn’t that she was fat. It probably had more to do with her breasts not being proportionally big enough for her body. Regardless, I felt like it was up to me to help out a friend. That’s how I met Tennessee.

She originally told me her name and I immediately forgot it. I made up for it by calling her Tennessee for the rest of the night. She thought it was funny. I was just trying to be clever. It ended up working and Tennessee was clearly interested. I felt like I was giving up in a way by pursuing her though. There were at least three other girls I had been talking to. I was almost stuck with Tennessee. If I left, Matt would have no shot with her friend.

In a way, I did leave. I somehow ended up in a cab with Tennessee. She was staying at a hotel with her friend. She explained that it was nearby. So I paid for the cab and followed walked her into the hotel. We had started out making out at the bar and continued to do so until she slid her card into her room door. She opened it up and revealed a large two room suite. There was only one bed.

I disregarded the idea that Matt might walk in at any moment with the friend. Tennessee seemed to understand as she alleviated my fears. “There’s a couch out there. We’ll be fine,” she explained.

For some reason, Family Guy was playing on the TV set. She left it on as we stripped naked. The lights stayed on giving us every opportunity to examine each others bodies. She really wasn’t unattractive. It was just a damn shame that she couldn’t shift some of her weight to her breasts. Oh well, I thought. I did wish we had shut the lights off though. Peter Griffin’s voice in the background didn’t help much either.

This was one of my first one night stands. It was also the first time I’d ever had unprotected sex. I remember pulling out and worrying about the mess. Tennessee giggled as I jogged over to the bathroom to grab a towel. I felt like I had disrespected her so I practically ran. Once I got rid of the guilt, babies and diseases were the only thing I could think of. The paranoia hit me hard.

I felt uncomfortable. So I put my clothes back on. Tennessee just lay on the bed naked and seemingly exhausted. I was putting on my belt and looking at her when I heard the front door open. I turned to the bedroom door and closed it shut. “Your friend just got home,” I stated.

It was then that Tennessee grabbed a bathrobe. She walked over to the door and opened it to join her friend. I walked out with her and noticed that Matt wasn’t there. The friend looked visibly annoyed. “Your friend went home,” she said with a large frown and disappointment in her eyes.

"That’s weird." I looked at the door and thought for a second. I still had my shoes off.

"Give me a second, I’ll go grab him."

I then opened the door and darted down the hallway. Even if Matt didn’t have a shot with the friend, he was my only ride home! I sprinted down the hotel corridors desperately trying to hunt him down. I called him repeatedly to no avail. I even shouted his name. He was either ignoring me or already on his way home. I was stranded.

I put my shoes on while sitting on a curb a block from the hotel. I didn’t want to go back up. I just wanted to go home. Luckily, my brother answered when I called. I told him my situation and he said it’d be fine if I crashed at his apartment, which would end up being my future room. The only issue was that I had to walk all the way to the 6th Avenue Path Train. That was a real pain in the ass.

I walked towards my destination and wondered why Matt had left so quickly. It may have had something to do with running into his Ex. The walk was excruciating. I had on black dress shoes that fit too tightly. I grew more pissed off as the pain spread through my legs. I was convinced that Matt had abandoned me on purpose. I felt like I was in Heaven when I finally made it to the air conditioned Path train.

The next day I went straight to work. I didn’t see Matt until he got home from class. Once he got back he told me about seeing his Ex and how he purposely bought a rose off of a random guy on the street. He gave it to the girl he was talking to and said, “Just so you know, I never do this. I’m only buying you this rose because my Ex is over there.”

That statement provided some context for the night. We didn’t really discuss what went on though.

"Well anyway, congratulations on being right," Matt said, changing the subject.

"What, you mean about the my nice natural Musk being a bad ass chick magnet and how I slept with two new girls in one night?" I bragged incessantly.

"Yea, I guess," he answered. "You’re still a filthy bastard though."

"Yea, I should probably shower." I pulled at my shirt and sniffed myself. Two layers of sweat had dried up and it wasn’t hard to smell it. "Maybe a bubble bath too."